Victims include compulsive masturbator, over-eater, alcoholic, TV watcher, slut, boring accountant

Gee, don't you love how CNN sums up people's lives in a one-word summation: "Bridge victims: 'Homer,' mom, 'chatterbox'". Yes, I'd like to remembered forever as a "chatterbox". (Hmm, I guess using the word "gossip" was going too far.)

Or, "mom" - yeah, forget anything else I ever did in my life, I want to be remebered forever as someone who gave birth - because God knows that's unique.

This has brought up a new fear: The one-word CNN life summation. What would yours be? There could be just the totally bland descriptors:
* Tall man
* Homeowner
* Former Ohioan

Then, there are the slightly more personal:
* Great Dane owner
* Coffee drinker
* Gout sufferer

And the ones you fear:
* Failed musician
* Web Designer
* Obscure blogger